


wouldn't you like to kiss him?

by liesmith



Category: NoPixel, no pixel
Genre: M/M, Soft Boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:08:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28121412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liesmith/pseuds/liesmith
Summary: who the fuck does he think he is, crawling into his life like he wasn't gone for a month?orsiz really did miss him
Relationships: al saab/siz fulker
Kudos: 14





	wouldn't you like to kiss him?

_hey siz, i’m going to miss you and your stupid two face. i’m leaving town for some time and unsure when i will be back. i love you and dont forget 831_

siz wakes up to the message and blinks a few times, eyes blurry and sleepy, and he hopes his sleep addled brain is playing a trick on him.

except when he ‘s more awake after a cold shower, staring down at his phone, siz realizes it isn’t a joke.

he smashes his phone into the ground.

when huck asks why he wasn’t answering earlier, siz just laughs and says his phone died, so sorry huck.

* * *

when he steps out of his house a month later, shaking his hoodie out from rucking up over what ant has begun to call his ‘primordial pouch, you know, like a cat!’, and he’s greeted by saab’s voice. fiona is excitedly talking his ear off, and saab’s laughing at her, and siz is frozen on his front step, one foot off the worn out welcome mat erin threw down forever ago. saab’s eyes flick towards him and siz doesn’t know what to think.

the man who couldn’t bother to say goodbye to him in person, who siz thought he meant something too, and now he’s rolling up with his sun kissed skin and blond hair, looking so fucking gorgeous, and it makes siz want to punch him. saab’s not even listening to fiona anymore, stepping past her, past huck, and siz can’t stop when he’s reeling his fist back and aiming it at saab, who looks dumbstruck as siz’s fist comes at him. siz tries for his nose, but punches saab in the jaw instead, and the blond stumbles back, holding his face and looking at siz, eyes dark and wet.

“get out of mirror park.”

somewhere off to his right huck’s trying to argue with him, but siz just tunes him out as saab clears his throat, wipes his mouth on the back of his sleeve, and climbs back into his car, peeling out from the front of siz’s house.

fiona tells him that wasn’t nice, and huck asks if they broke up, because it’s _fucking_ huck, and siz just goes back into his house and slams the door. for good measure, he locks it, too.

* * *

no matter how many locks he puts up, in his home, in mirror park, in his heart, saab always finds a way in. siz is trying to sleep, curled uncomfortably in the corner of his bed, staring at the dark grey vivi insisted on painting his room when she decorated. he hears the jiggle of his window and wonders how on earth saab was a criminal; he’s loud as hell, and if siz wasn’t siz, saab would’ve earned a bullet between his eyes by now.

but siz is siz.

so he doesn’t do anything as saab gets his window unlocked and opened, tumbling inside and cursing to himself. siz can make out ‘stupid window’, as if it’s the windows fault saab sucks at breaking in, and he tries to fight the urge to smile at the idea of saab standing there, glaring at the window like it owes him something and mumbling to himself about it. he doesn’t move when his bed sags, saab’s weight all on the edge of it. siz wonders if saab’s waiting for him to speak first; no way in hell is he going to give saab that kind of pleasure.

but he missed saab so much. no matter how pissed off he is, how much he would rather hate saab’s guts and beat the shit out of him, siz can feel his resolve starting to crack at an alarming rate, like a step onto an icy pond that’s not as thick as you realized.

lucky for him, he guesses, because saab speaks.

“.... i…. know you’re mad at me,” the blond starts, and siz can picture him with his shoulders sagged, head down and hands in his lap, picking at the skin around his nails, “but… i couldn’t stop what was in motion. we had to go, you know? buddha’s family, he’s done everything for us, and-”

“so family means more than me?” siz asks, voice wavering. he hates the weakness in it, the weakness in himself, “saab, you owe me more than just a fake apology.”

“i wasn’t done!” saab’s flustered, voice shaking as his fist hits his thigh, “i didn’t even apologize yet! siz, shut the fuck up and let me speak!”

siz falters at saab’s tone, finally looking over his shoulder at the blond, whose fists are balled against his thighs, shoulders scrunched and shaking. he’s crying, siz realizes, and he can’t be mad anymore. the brunet pushes himself up to his knees before he’s wrapping his arms around saab, pulling the blond tight to his body. saab just hiccups and his hands fist in siz’s hoodie, knee pressing uncomfortably into his thigh, as if he was trying to get as close to siz, to get _inside_ of siz almost.

“i’m s-sorry,” saab hiccups out, voice half muffled by where his mouth is pressed into siz’s shoulder, “i… i didn’t want t-to go, i didn’t want to… leave you, and…”

“... you’re here now,” siz whispers, afraid to speak any louder in case his voice cracks, wrapping his arms tighter around saab, “just… you shut up, now.”

saab hiccups a laugh, holding tighter onto siz, and the brunet shifts a little as he slowly finds himself laying back against his bed, saab’s weight following him downwards. it’s not that siz has been alone; with his long list of endless bodies, he knows he’s not really alone, but being with saab… it’s just different. it feels just like home. he tucks his face into the soft blond, eyes lidding as he adjusts his arms around saab to try and stay comfortable, though he knows it’s a moot point because as soon as saab’s out, he’s dead weight and hard to maneuver around.

it’s kind of amazing how fast saab can go from hysterically sobbing to conked out, snoring into siz’s hoodie like it’s nothing, while siz lays there, staring at his ceiling, the weight of saab somehow making his whole body numb.

it’s a feeling he misses.

* * *

when he comes too, saab’s gone. sudden, sleepy panic sets in as siz practically bolts upright, groping along his bed as if saab will suddenly manifest. siz thinks: he’s left again, he’s left me again, i should’ve known better, maybe i hallucinated saab, but

his bathroom door opens, and saab’s walking out, towel drying his hair. he’s wearing a pair of siz’s boxers, which look incredibly silly on him, and siz just stares. saab looks back at him, brows furrowed, and then he waves, smiling wide at siz, who just… laughs, covering his face with his hands.

“... i thought you left.”

“huh?” saab questions, padding over to the bed and kneeling down on it, hands covering siz’s as he pulls them away from his face, “what do you mean?”

“like you left me again,” siz’s voice is softer, feeling vulnerable as saab looks at his face so closely, “like, gone. forever, again.”

“oh,” saab looks away, shoulders sagging. siz is sure he feels guilty for what siz is feeling, but… it’s not saab’s fault people leave him. siz just never gave a shit about those other people, “... i won’t. i swear, i’ll never do that again.”

promises are just words, and words can be broken, and siz knows this, but he still turns his hands into saab’s and leans up, pressing his lips to saab’s. the blond exhales out against his mouth and squeezes siz’s hands, kissing him back for a moment before he pulls away, forehead butting into siz’s. he squeezes siz’s hands again and the brunet just lids his eyes, looking at saab and nosing against his cheek.

“if… you go again, just take me with you.”

saab gives a nervous laugh, looking away and shaking his head. “yeah, i know… how your boys are. i’m not looking to lose limbs here, sizzy. i just… i promise. i’ll never go again like that. i missed you so much.”

“... yeah?” siz questions softly, thumb running over saab’s knuckles, “mexico doesn’t hit the same?”

“no,” saab murmurs, rubbing his cheek against siz’s, “nothing hits like you do.”

siz snorts. saab can be so corny in such a stupid way. “i think you’re telling me you love me, so i’ll take the compliment.”

“of course i love you,” saab sounds almost offended, pressing himself a little close to siz’s body, “... and i did miss you, in… more ways than one.”

of course saab’s horny. siz snorts softly as he feels saab’s forehead touch his, eyes lidding. “... show me, then.”

saab’s sharp inhale makes siz shiver as hands gently settle at his waist, fingers squishing into his stomach. the blond just noses into siz’s cheek, kissing the side of his nose, then the corner of his mouth.the hands on his waist start roaming downwards until they find a home on siz’s thighs, thumbs dragging along the inseam of his pajama bottoms.

“... you used to wear jeans to bed,” saab murmurs softly, fondness in his voice as he kisses the corner of siz’s mouth again, “i missed so much in a month. what else changed?”

siz wants to point out the obvious, his primordial pouch, but he doesn’t necessarily want to ruin the momen with self-loathing. “don’t be weird if we’re going to do something.”

“i’m not being weird,” saab scoffs, pulling back to look at siz, eyes meeting the lidded gaze, “i just… it’s, um… strange. how much i missed in a month. i feel like… it’s been a lifetime.”

saying ‘don’t leave’ seems pointless. siz isn’t really in the mood to keep kicking saab when he’s down, anyways. “well, you’re here now.”

“... i am,” saab agrees and leans forward, kissing siz softly, “and i’ll always be here.”

“get better lockpicking skills, then,” siz grins against his mouth, “what kind of criminal are you?”

saab just laughs as he snuggles closer to siz, hands reaching up to slide into siz’s hair, eyes lidding. “a bad one, ‘cause you stole my heart.”

the audible groan from siz just draws more laughter from saab, who starts to push him down onto the bed. he moves with the blond, arms settling above his head as he looks up at saab, who just… is staring at him, eyes dark and full of love. it makes siz want to shy away instantly; he loves saab with all his heart, but the way saab looks at him like he’s the center of the universe, like he’s the sun… it makes siz feel so very, very small.

but he knows as the hands start to move downwards, just barely touching his body as they finally settle at his waist, that no matter what, saab will always love him, will always take care of him. siz just closes his eyes, exhaling out softly.

saab kisses his cheek before his body starts to move downwards, weight finally settling between siz’s legs. fingers creep from his waist to the band of his pajama pants, pulling them down. the brunet lifts his hips to assist, feeling his boxers go next. foreplay is usually saab’s favorite, but he must be impatient; siz doesn’t blame him, though. he’s feeling about the same at this point, and when saab’s hands are actually on him, spreading siz, his breath hitches. under his own pounding heart, siz can make out saab’s breathing, stuttery and nervous, like it’s their first time again.

it might as well be.

saab’s breath is warm over his folds and siz whines out, hips giving a small rock. saab is just enjoying himself, siz guesses, because he is just giving siz kitten licks against his folds, just enough pressure to make siz squirm, but not enough to give him any sort of relief. it’s going to drive him crazy at this rate, but he doesn’t have to complain or beg. saab’s mouth is around his clit, tongue pressing flat to the nub. siz gives a full body shudder, thighs almost locking around saab’s head. the feeling is… overwhelming. getting head isn’t anything new; siz can say it’s one of his favorite things, but the fact it’s saab is making him ten times more sensitive. he missed this stupid no brain idiot with all of his heart, and getting into his head, all mushy like this while saab’s between his legs makes him feel kind of like an idiot for not focusing on him, but it’s what siz feels truly: in his veins, in his bones, the thrum of his love for saab.

the blond has gone from just keeping his mouth around siz’s clit to licking around his rim, teasing to push in, before he finally does it, making siz whimper out softly. saab’s tongue presses deep into him, just rolling into him. siz can’t help squeezing his thighs together now, squishing saab between them, but it doesn’t seem to deter him at all. saab’s begun to thrust his tongue, a hand creeping upwards. his fingers brush over his folds, collecting wet between them, dragging to his clit, and siz shivers as saab just rubs gently over his hard nub, circling it and making siz shake, thighs quivering. saab just enjoys himself, pulling back from giving siz head to give soft, kitten licks to his folds before turning to kiss at the thighs still around his head. the scratch of his beard on the sensitive skin makes siz whine low, chancing a glance down at his boyfriend.

saab’s eyes meet his and siz exhales out, a sharp sound in his ears.

“... sizzy,” saab’s voice quivers, “i love you. can you cum for me?”

the stare, the pointer against his clit, the thumb just rubbing tight circles against his entrance. it’s all too much and siz tilts his head back, hips pushing up as he cries out, cumming with a tremble. saab just teases him through it before his mouth is back against siz, licking again at him. siz shivers from the sensitivity but finds himself a little lost in it, sinking into his bed. saab lets up after a moment, kissing over siz’s thighs again before he pushes away from the brunet, instantly laying all his weight on siz, mouth on siz’s in no time, and siz has little time himself to react. he just laughs, sudden and surprised into the kiss, and feels saab smile against his mouth. siz can taste himself all over saab and sighs out softly, feeling the heat burn through his body.

he pulls away first, a hand on saab’s chest.

“... w-what about you?”

“don’t care,” saab says, forehead dipping to touch siz’s, “only care about you.”

kind of unlike saab to ignore his own needs, but siz can’t say he’s going to push it. if saab just wants to be lovey dovey on him, that’s fine by him. maybe a little selfish, but siz doesn’t care. his arms wrap around saab, who just melts into him, adjusting his body until his head is on siz’s chest, curled against the frame beneath him.

siz thinks for a moment where to put his hands before one settles gently on his wrist, pointer curled around it, and the other dips into saab’s hair. it’s still a little damp from his shower, but siz can still pet through it, feel the way saab shivers against him. might even be purring, to be honest.

and in the quiet of the morning, siz realizes this will be his later, his tomorrow, his week from now, his months from now, his years from now.

saab will always be with him.

siz turns slightly, eyes lidding as he gets comfortable under saab, legs tangling with the blond’s. right now, siz couldn’t think of a better way to exist.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm tired


End file.
